“…..what I think you should do is….”

She paused for a moment as she collected her thoughts to sum them up in one word.

Melanie, sat there and waited expectantly to hear what her friend would tell her. They had been friends for a long time and even though Casey was a maverick chatterbox, she had a good sense of acuity that was rare and beneficial at the same time. Her percipience had the knack of coming out raw and curt because most of the time it was objective and devoid of feminine emotion. That pause seemed to take an eternity and Melanie waited…

“Nothing!”, said Casey


“Yes don’t do anything, don’t say a word, don’t make a move!”

“Okay, that was helpful”, Mel replied with a sarcastic tone 

“Your situation is really tricky, because for one you are married to this guy who doesn’t look like he will outgrow his unimaginative tendencies. He is an okay guy and he is the father of your children. On the other hand you have what I would have a disposable relationship with….”

“A disposable what….??”, Melanie leaned forward in pouncing mode.She seemed angered by the fact that she was looking at ‘her thing with Max’ as something you can easily pick up and drop at will.

“Hear me out sweetheart, you wanted my opinion and this is my judicious perspective and then I’ll let you decide on what you will do”

Sigh, “okay”, said Melanie as she leaned back on her seat.

“Fact, you are a married woman with three kids. Fact, you have been reduced to a shell of your former self. For all intents and purposes, my basic description of you is a housewife and a mother. In short you are a bored woman living with a boring husband called Boris, you and I know that and it has taken a decade for you to realize that you cannot change him. Now here is the other side, Fact, Maxwell is divorced and available for now and going by what you tell me about him, he won’t be for long. Some random chic will conveniently parade herself in his vicinity, I’m sure you know how caring dads are an attractive eye candy to any lady. Fact, he is a serious Christian and you are not. Fact, the two of you have some electric chemistry, but he hasn’t made a move and nor has he declared his intentions so you can only speculate. Is he waiting for angel Gabriel to give him the go ahead, we don’t know. Well, so what does that leave you….you are in the valley of decision and my take is you stay put and do nothing and let the events unfold and then you will make the decisions along the way.”


Both friends stared at each other for about 10 seconds before Casey’s phone rang.

“Oops, that’s my assistant, I had forgotten about my afternoon appointment, please excuse me as I reschedule”

“Take your time”, replied Melanie

Casey continued, “A part of me wants to tell you to stay and save your marriage for the sake of your kids, but I’m not a nun, I’m a bad girl and I know that you have only one life to live and these are your best years. So you’ll either stay in that sexless marriage and become toothless with Mr. Boring or throw in the towel and face the wrath of the world, but you are taking a shot at happiness, your own definitive happiness. Honey, you are on the stand and we are the jury just waiting for you to make a move that we don’t like and then we will drop the hammer with our verdict, yes that’s us. We will vilify and castigate you in the court of public opinion because that’s what we do.

My sane self tells me that it could be a big gamble if you decide to be bold enough and be the unconventional postmodern woman and tell Maxwell exactly how you feel with the hope that you have been reading the correct vibe from him. If the feeling is mutual, then you two will probably begin something on the side, an affair….I meant to say that you will be cheating on your husband, the father of your kids. So you will have to decide whether to leave him with his colourless life and walk into the horizon with your dishy lad or have two men in your life that serve parallel purposes. 

I know women who can seamlessly weave an exciting affair right under their husband’s nose and he won’t have any suspicions that you are sleeping with his brother or his best friend. Men can be clueless. So if you have the skill and determination to go this route then by all means plunge in headfirst, but be warned, it takes a lot of work. Again we will vilify and castigate you in the court of public opinion because that is what we do, we like a good story and we can’t wait to tear you apart.

Or you can decide to be the bigger person and tell him that you are just trying to catch up with your heart which is speaking a different dialect from what you already know. You want to learn that language of your heart, but then you know that it is a dangerous route because once you learn it, then there is no telling as to what you will do or become and so you are calling it off. You will then pull out your boys from that soccer club and find them a new hobby or something, as you do this, just know that you are walking back into your marital prison. Or maybe, just leave your husband….divorce the man and marry your muffin and be happy. Okay, your hubby will be heartbroken, your kids will feel bad but after sometime they will get used to the idea that there is an english word called ‘divorce’ with a real meaning and there are so many blended families today. So what will you do?”

Meanwhile on the other side of town, Maxwell was meeting with a friend of his to have some man talk. 

“Boy, you have been on my mind for long”, began Max

“You are kidding me, how comes you haven’t called?”

“Well, you are a busy family man and so I just don’t want to bother you unless it’s something really serious”

“Come on, get outta here, you mean we can’t just hang out?”

“Well, I tried and I gave up, when was the last time we met just to talk random stuff?

“Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…..about 6,7 months ago?”

“You see”

“I’m sorry man, I will try and change, anyway, what’s up?”

“Boy, I’m in a dilemma”

“What kind, are you in debt?”

“No it’s about money”

“Is it your ex wife?”

“No, it’s not her, it’s me?”


Uneasy pause

“I’m falling in…or at least I think I’m falling in love with…”

“Yessss!! Yiiiesssss!!!!!,”, he stood up and grabbed Max and gave him a big tight hug and slapped him hard on the back.

“Eiii, okay man, chill out that’s just half the story”

“No, this is good news. You have been miserable for a long time and it’s time you find your happiness”

“Well, this is complicated”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, she is married”



“Noooo….you’re kidding me!!!!”

“Shhhh, you are shouting”

“I’m sorry but….okay tell me more”

Maxwell went on to narrate the story of how they met and instantly clicked and developed a strange bond. His friend just sat there and absorbed the details.

“Yep, so that’s my story. This is new territory for me, it is challenging everything that I know to be true and Valentine’s day is 3 days away. A part of me wants to do for her something to express my affection for her and yet my rational Christian self knows that it is the wrong thing because I’m beginning the process of breaking down another family. Arrrghhhh….you see the pull that I have towards her is sooooo strong and inexplicably magnetic. It is sooo fluid and soo enthralling, I’m just not myself anymore, what should I do?”

His friend took a deep breath before he began his talk.

“I can only imagine your situation and as a man, I would want to tell you to follow your heart, but as a brother and a Christian, I’m afraid you will just have to make the hard choice and follow your values and your conviction. Think about how you felt when your wife cheated on you…. the pain, the agony the constant turmoil that you went through and the eventual collapse of your marriage. Think about the devastation that it brought to your kids and then think about what you are about to do to some other innocent kids. Think about God and his word and what he says about adultery.

You see, I have a wife that I love, but my marriage is far from perfect. It has taken me a long time to come to terms with the fact that women will never get satisfied with whatever you do. There is always a higher standard they are setting for you. You will always seem to be falling short of something and don’t even mention the constant nagging and demand for attention, it can be tiring, but you know what, that’s marriage. God expects me as the husband to love my wife, period! With all her insecurities, her complexities and her perception of my imperfections, I’m supposed to love her because I made a vow and I intend to stick to it…..” and he continued lecturing his friend who briefly drifted to think about Mel

Would I want a better marriage with no issues, sure I would love to but her, I signed the paper and this is my deal and it will kill me if someone had an affair with my wife, in fact I don’t know what I would do”

“Yeah man”, said Max while drifting back from his thoughts, “I hear you, I get you….”

What both men did not realize is that upto this moment, they were talking about the same woman!